“I thought we made a deal — then he just stopped showing up”
When a woman on the parenting forums of Mumsnet agreed to let her partner bring home a “perfect puppy,” it wasn’t a spontaneous gift. There was a condition: he would take on most of the caregiving duties. She already had two dogs—one elderly, one a rambunctious young pup—and made it clear that she couldn’t add a third unless he stepped up.
But after just one week, the new pup is thriving, and he hardly has. The wife’s frustration has boiled over. What looked like a joyful new addition to the family is now a relationship stressor—and she’s seriously considering telling him to get rid of the dog.
The perfect puppy—and the perfect storm
She admits: the dog is beautiful and loving. That’s part of what made the whole situation possible in the first place.
But loving dogs—and caring for them—are very different things.
In her post, she revealed that her husband had fed the puppy exactly once. Every other chore—feeding, walking, playing, cleanup—had fallen on her shoulders. Already juggling her college classes and two other dogs, she’s exhausted.
A turning point came one evening when she and their daughter went for a girls’ sleepover at her sister’s home. She offered to take the dogs with her. He insisted he’d handle everything. She trusted him. She left at 7 p.m., confident that the dogs were “sorted for the night.”
When she came home the next day at 1 p.m., none of the dogs had been fed. Not the elderly one. Not the almost-2-year-old. Not the new puppy.
“Selling the puppy”? She doesn’t want to—but she doesn’t know what to do
Her post makes it clear: she doesn’t want to flip the puppy for cash, trash-it, or dump it on someone without warning. “I do not agree with getting animals and selling them,” she says.
But she also feels cornered. Her life was busy already. Now she’s taking on the bulk of the labor—feeding, walking, playing—of not one, but three dogs. It’s overwhelming. And she’s seriously questioning whether this “perfect puppy” was worth the conflict.
Online readers mostly sided with the wife
Her post sparked reactions—and the tone was overwhelmingly supportive. In a poll below her post, a whopping 92% of more than 500 respondents said: “You are NOT being unreasonable.”
Some readers didn’t pull punches:
“He’s being unfair to you and the puppy. The puppy would be much better off with someone who loved and cared for it.”
“I’d get rid of both him and the puppy as he sounds useless.”
It’s clear the online community sees this as less about the dog and more about a breakdown in partnership and follow-through.
When “getting a puppy together” becomes a test of trust
This story is less “a man neglected his puppy” and more “a couple made a pact—and one partner quietly dropped out.”
On the surface, it seemed sweet: he wanted a puppy, and she agreed—on the idea that he’d handle most of the new burden. But when reality hit, the balance shifted entirely. Now she’s left bearing the weight—emotionally, physically, and logistically—and wondering whether she should undo the agreement altogether.
It’s a cautionary tale about making deals before the puppy kisses begin: if you’re going to bring a living creature into your home, one person can’t just hope the other picks up the slack. For many people, dogs are family—and families work best when everyone carries their share of the load.
Final thoughts: Puppies test teamwork
Welcoming a puppy is one of life’s great joys — but also one of its great tests. Dogs thrive in homes where care is consistent and love is shared. For couples, that means honoring agreements, carrying equal weight, and recognizing that every walk, meal, and vet visit is part of a long-term commitment.
Getting a puppy together can strengthen a relationship — but only if both partners treat it as a team effort from day one.
Andrew Alpin from India is the Brand Manager of Doggo digest. Andrew is an experienced content specialist and social media manager with a passion for writing. His forte includes health and wellness, Travel, Animals, and Nature. A nature nomad, Andrew is obsessed with mountains and loves high-altitude trekking. He has been on several Himalayan treks in India including the Everest Base Camp in Nepal.
